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GUYS RULE!

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 7:45 am
by tis2flyyy
This one is Especially for you...all of your very special guys with all of the flavor......your very own list of rules!!!


The Guys Rule

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally , the guys' side of the story.
(I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear "the rules "
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!



1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible , Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will Be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine... Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Re: GUYS RULE!

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 10:00 am
by bingolong
tis2flyyy,
The only time I am leaving the toilet down is after I take a dump!!!!1 @.@

Re: GUYS RULE!

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 10:47 am
by tis2flyyy
bingolong,
ewwww! Yuck! I was eating when I read this!

Re: GUYS RULE!

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 12:12 pm
by dougdigitalpro
tis2flyyy,
That's pretty much it in a nutshell. :)

Re: GUYS RULE!

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 12:26 pm
by hellifiknow
tis2flyyy,
I walked in on my step-brother sitting on the toilet taking a dump while eating the big mac and fries he had sitting on the sink counter beside him...now thats ewww yuck! :lol:

Bingolong,
we all know how to train a woman to lift the seat when she's done...make it so sticky it sounds like cling wrap when their ass comes off the toilet seat. ;p :lol:


Re: GUYS RULE!

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 12:46 pm
by tis2flyyy
dougdigitalpro,
:lol:

Re: GUYS RULE!

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 1:20 pm
by Murphdogg
rule number 2. if you don't want a man to cheat on you, marry a man too ugly to be with you, otherwise he's most likely going to cheat on you. Unless he's like me and too lazy to cheat..so I guess marry either a ugly or a lazy man or just accept he's going to do other women and what not. I guess being ugly and lazy I'm the total package ladies.

Re: GUYS RULE!

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 2:38 pm
by bcddjjsc690
tis2flyyy,
your always eating in/thru the thread .. ]:o)

MEN ....we have a penis ,and we can lift heavy objects B-)

Re: GUYS RULE!

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 3:35 pm
by tis2flyyy
bcddjjsc690,
WHHHAAATTTT!!!! Penis!! oooooohh, I am going to TELL!!!
So what you are really trying to say is TWO heads are better than one?
]:o)

Re: GUYS RULE!

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 3:36 pm
by tis2flyyy
Murphdogg,
Baby doll, but you are alrady taken!
But I am sad to report to you that unfortunately -
There is no rule to make a man not cheat. It is in their genetic make up - it can not be averted.