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10. I suck at everything else
9. A desperate need for attention
8. I have no musical talent
7. someone had to steal Buddy Hackets material
6. mistakingly thought comedy would git me chicks
5. thought I'd actually make money at it
4. only way to get anyone to listen to me babel on like a jackass
3. Becasue I thought my joke about airline peanuts would take me to the top
2. the dream of staring in a buddy flick with David Hassalhoff
1. I felt not enough comics had jokes about smoking weed
1.

Murphdogg,

10. A guitar can't bring anything new in the music world that hasn't already been done.
9. I was good at heckling teachers in high school, and one actually yelled at me in the hall,"This isn't a comedy club!"...hey, looks like a job...
8. I simply adore smoking.
7. The chick to guy ratio! Oh yeah! ...except the majority of the guys are freaks or creeps... and the ones who aren't are already married...and are called "headliners"
6. I can get into clubs while not being 21!
5. I love the sound of my own voice.
4. What I write is cooler than shakespeare...and no director telling me I said something wrong.
3. Comedic Influence! (I want to be like!)
2. The famous people who really suck! (And give me hope.)
1. Bringing people Joy/The shallow love of many.